3 Lessons Learned from 3 Months of Coffee Chats

Networking gives me anxiety. The traditional networking events are a total nightmare for me and introverts everywhere.

Making small talk in a room full of strangers? Pass. Having everyone try to pitch and sell you something? No thanks. Wasting time driving to the place without a guarantee that anyone you meet will be worth it? Yikes.

There are so many different ways to network outside of giant, in person events. For me, someone who enjoys connecting 1:1 and not having to drive to meet, it’s way more fun and easy to network in other ways.

My new favorite method is doing virtual coffee chats. This helps me connect and engage with people all over the world in a less overwhelming way.

Here’s a few things I’ve learned from 3 months of virtual coffee chats.

People don’t like cold pitching.

I totally get this one. I think I’ve gotten cold pitches on every social media platform where I have a profile.

I’m not sure why people think constantly badgering and begging people for the sale makes them want to purchase from you.

For me it’s the opposite. Even if I was intrigued or interested the annoying way these people communicate is a total turn off.

People are sometimes hesitant when I reach out and send messages asking for a virtual coffee chat. They think I’m trying to trick them into a sales pitch.

My purpose for coffee chats is connection not sales. The only way I would even consider pitching is if the person needed my services or I could provide value to them.

Even if someone seemed like the perfect potential client I wouldn’t pitch if they weren’t ready to upgrade their site or branding. Instead this is about building relationships, connections and networking.

People want genuine connection and conversation.

Every time I heard the advice to network I just pretended like they were talking to someone else.

Not me the shy, neurodivergent person who would rather eat a shoe than go to a traditional, in person networking event.

I find it a lot easier to get to know people 1:1 than trying to find them in a room. With the option to connect virtually it makes it even easier. Technology for the win.

It’s so much easier to go deeper and get to know someone even in just 20 to 30 minutes. Many times we don’t just talk about business. I’ve seen pets and murals make cameos while chatting away. We go down fun tangents and find other connections.

People want to help you.

After talking to someone for only 20 minutes they are ready to support me in my business or have a connection they want to introduce me to. If you’d told me it was this simple to have people be willing to help you and you wanting to help them in return I would’ve laughed. It seems like it’s too good to be true.

Even though it seems like magic it’s really just psychology; the rule of reciprocity. People often use this tactic in sales. They will help you with something small and you’ll feel obligated to help them in return which is usually purchasing something.

You might figure out in the conversation that you have nothing in common or no connection outside of this chat. Sometimes this happens and I still offer support if they need something.

I’m just glad I finally found a way to network and connect with people that doesn’t give me an anxiety attack. This is also much easier to find referrals when you have people who can recommend you at any time.

Are virtual coffee chats right for you?

Depending on your business goals I think virtual coffee chats work for everyone. If you love being in person and chatting up tons of people they might not be your favorite.

For me they are a convenient and easy way to connect with business owners and entrepreneurs one on one from the comfort of my home office.

Have I sold you on the virtual coffee chat yet? If you’re an online business owner, coach, consultant or entrepreneur who wants to try it out here’s my calendly link.

I’d love to connect and chat with you!